Artwork by Sam Rapien
In 2009, the Women’s Flat Track Derby Association changed from a two to a four region format, creating an East, West, North Central and South Central division. Most observers felt the all star team from the Austin league that started the modern flat track revolution, the Texas Rollergirl’s Texecutioners, in as the top seed in the South. With the Kansas City Roller Warriors standing firm in second place, the only drama remaining at the 2009 WFTDA South Central Regional Tournament, the Southern Fried Smackdown, was who would fill the third place spot. At the Shriner’s Auditorium in Atlanta, the best game for the casual fan was watching the Houston Roller Derby’s HaRD Knocks and the Dallas Derby Devil’s All Stars slug it out for the right to go to the WFTDA Championships in Philadelphia and get bushwacked by the Rocky Mountain Roller Girls. This year, there are several new factors that make the 2010 South Central’s Amber Waves of Pain regional tournament harder to predict.
Texas Vs Charm use courtesy of Ziv Kruger
Starting at the top, the Texas Rollergirl’s Texecutioners find themselves in familiar territory. Ranked number one in the South, they retain the position they’ve occupied uninterrupted since the first quarter of 2009. However, the 2010 squad is vastly different from the team that finished second in last year’s championships. Retirees included Bullet Tooth Tracy, Desi Cration, Cat Tastrophe, and Rice Rocket. The biggest question for this team is whether they can replace the power those women brought and leave behind the tendency to give their opponents a power jam in the last jam of the game.
The new look Texies have had a very mixed 2010 season. When playing teams from the state of Texas, the Texecutioners went 4-0 with a cumulative margin of victory of 762 points. When playing outside of their home state, though, the Texies went 1-6. But for Rat City (#5 West), they played teams that are all in the top 3 of their respective regions and their average margin of defeat was a much more respectable 22.2 points.
The Kansas City Roller Warriors started 2010 in the same place they began, and ended, regional play in 2009. However, quarter two of this year saw them usurped from their #2 ranking by Atlanta. The Dirty South Derby Girls have had arguably the best 2010 season of the entire South Central Region. Since losing to the Dallas Derby Devils by 31 points in the opening round of the Southern Fried Smackdown, 2010 has seen Atlanta reel off eleven victories against only two losses. Led by their oft-decorated captain Amelia Scareheart and long time Dirty Souther Demi Gore, the team’s impressive run included a 124-111 victory in Atlanta over Kansas City. Only two of their victories came against teams that are not participating in the 2010 regional tournaments.
KC vs Cincinnati use courtesy of Phil Peterson
Comparing Kansas City and Atlanta becomes more difficult when one looks at their respective records. Kansas City finished interleague competition with five wins and four losses, but playing arguably the toughest schedule aside from Texas’. While they had losses to Charm (#3 East), Philly (#2 East), and Detroit (#2 North), they defeated Cincinnati (#4 North) and Arch Rival (#8 North). Of more considerable interest is the return of several players that played a pivotal role in KC’s championship run in 2007. Fielding a team that includes veterans Patti Wackin, Bruz-Her and Kelley Young nee Snot Rocket along with second year phenom Track Rat, Kansas City should make a considerably stronger move back to claiming the WFTDA championship trophy, the Hydra, than they did in 2009. Whether the lessons learned from playing a their higher level of competition along with the return of the aforementioned players can vault Kansas City past Atlanta will likely be settled on a Saturday afternoon in Lincoln, Nebraska.
Continuing to hold the #4 ranking are the Dallas Derby Devils, either the most active team in 2010, the most pissed off, or both. Dallas made a major move up in 2009 when they absorbed several key skaters from their cross town rivals, the Assassination City Roller Derby. Facing Texas in their semifinal game at the Smackdown, Dallas made a tactical decision to rest some of their best skaters to better prepare for the third place game. The next day against Houston, after one of the most exciting games of the tournament, Dallas was left staring at a 12 point game deficit and watched the WFTDA championship from home.
Dallas Derby Devils vs Texas use courtesy of Bill Smotrillo
Since that loss, Dallas has been playing teams at a furious pace, accumulating an 12-7 record in only seven months. At the Clover Cup (in Dallas), they lost in their first game to Atlanta by 64 points. In the rematch, they lost by only 27. Playing in Tampa Bay, they had a mere 2 point loss to Cincinnati. This was at a point in time when Cincinnati featured only one skater who wore the name “Sadistic Sadie” on her jersey. Their most impressive victory was a 40 point home win over the surprise north central power Minnesota (#7 North). Long time Dallas blocker and occasional power jammer Barooski leads the attack, with continued support from Hot 4 Teacher and fan favorite Anita Riot.
The Nashville Rollergirls’ Music City All Stars began 2010 with a bitter taste in their mouth guards. In 2009, the WFTDA went with a let’s destroy the souls of the six seeds format competitive seeding format for the regional tournaments. This included pairing the six seeds with the one seeds in the first round. With no consideration given that their mothers and children might be watching, Nashville went
Nashville's Belligerent Fans Express Their True Sentiments
up against Texas in the first round, and was summarily dispensed with. Using that loss as motivation, Nashville has run off a 10-3 record in 2010. Starting quickly, they went 7-0 before losing for the first time at the East Cost Derby Extravaganza against North Star (#6 North) by 36 points. Impressive wins against Atlanta and Montreal (#6 East) are balanced against a 113 point road loss to Steel City (#5 East). Nashville has spent the last two years gradual getting better, but remaining just outside of the upper echelon of WFTDA. They return several players for 2010, including captain 5 Scar Jeneral and blocker/jammer/pivot/destroyer of announcer tables Lady Fury. Whether this is the year they make their move up, a la the Minnesota Roller Girls, or whether they continue fighting for 5th place is a question for which their fans are likely furiously punching orphans in preparation.
Coming in with a 5-9 record in 2010, the Tampa Bay Derby Darlins have only one victory of note. A 104-101 win over Dallas in the Rocket City Tournament in July, 2010 saw them fall by substantial margins to Montreal, Atlanta, Brew City (#5 North), and Cincinnati. Enthusiasm for their victory over Dallas must be tempered in light of their three prior losses to the Derby Devils in 2010, with the smallest margin of defeat being 20 points.
No Coast vs Omaha use courtesy of Taura Horn
The HaRD Knocks from Houston are still reeling from their 239-46 loss to Rocky Mountain in last years championships. After losing several of their skaters to retirement, Houston went only 3-7 in 2010, with two of those victories coming against Assassination City (#18 South), and the other against the Dixie Derby Girls (#14 South). They did skate Toaster City (#42 Mid South Almost Northern Just Off The Center Of The Mid East West) to a dramatic 0-0 tie, with both team’s jammers setting records in penalty minutes, and jammer refs Prof. Murder and Judge Knot coming to blows over who could call his jammer to the box first.
Skating at home in the regional tournament, the No Coast Derby Girls come in after a relatively light schedule. Playing only eight games, they went 6-2. However, all six victories came against teams that did not qualify for regional play, and a 12 point loss to Tampa along with a 167 point loss to Atlanta does not bode well for their chances.
The Hard Knox Roller Girls out of Knoxville enter the Amber Waves of Pain as the only team that did not participate in 2009’s Southern Fried Smackdown. Hard Knox went 7-4 in 2010. Like No Coast, five of their seven victories came against teams that did not qualify for regional competition. The remaining two victories came against Memphis.
Memphis’ Hustlin’ Rollers, the #10 seed, went 5-5 in 2010. Much like the two teams ranked above them, Memphis beat only teams that are not competing in regional competition, with one exception. Playing in Memphis last March, they defeated Hard Knox by 45 points . The impact of this victory is lessened by their two subsequent losses to Knoxville. However, as those losses were by only 18 and 2 points, Memphis may be slightly under ranked.
Feel free to discuss below, and come back Wednesday as I roll out my winners and losers for the weekend.